158344

Joke of the Day

"I traded my brother for an old Game Boy game I'm still not sure what that old guy wanted him for."

"So I was eating out my Grandma... ...And I tasted horse semen and thought, *Ohh, so that's how she died.*"

"I fed the pigs at my farm their food, I guess I could say they went ham"

"Dad: Why are your eyes red, son? Son: I smoke weed, dad. Dad: Don't lie to me, you were crying because you're a faggot."

"I asked my girlfriend if looks and money were important to her when choosing a boyfriend... she said ""Clearly not."" :-("

"A man walks into a bar... ...and loses the international limbo championship. (I feel like this is probably really old, but I hadn't heard it before.)"

"A dog was giving birth on the side of the road... She was cited with littering."

"My Dad has the heart of a lion and so much hate mail he had to shut down his dental practice"

"Because he always knew what the punchline would be. Why didn't the psychic laugh at any jokes?"

"What do you get when you cross a pig with an elephant? A very large animal that knows a lot of jokes."