90197

Joke of the Day

"I didn't vote for Trump, but at least Now I get to find out how He's going to Build That Wall and make Mexico pay for it."

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"Is it crazy how saying sentences backwards... ...creates backwards sentences saying how crazy it is?"
"The man who invented distorted mirrors has died. His funeral will be held in asymmetry."
"COP: Damn I left my regular handcuffs at home, all I have is these candy handcuffs. I trust that u won't eat ur way out of these CROOK: Sure"
"An alligator can grow up to 17 feet. But most only have four."
"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time."
"My neighbor's kids said they loved sneakers. They're huge Vans of them."
"Knock Knock Who's there? The Pilot. Let me in."
"Ways to get ants out of your house: 1) Ant traps 2) Say you had a good time but it's late & you have work tomorrow 3) Set house on fire"
"In light of Google becoming Alphabet, Gmail will be replaced with ""Alpha Mail."""