90197

Joke of the Day

"I didn't vote for Trump, but at least Now I get to find out how He's going to Build That Wall and make Mexico pay for it."

"What is the difference between homeless and vodka? Vodka does not freeze"

"What did Abraham Lincoln say after a three-day drinking spree? ""I freed the what?"""

"I hate meeting girls dads That's why I date black women."

"Doctor's appt: doctor checked me for hernia. Oddly replaced typical ""turn your head and cough"" with ""who's my dirty bitch."""

"What happens when you mix a snowman and a vampire? Frostbite"

"My friend told me he was afraid of Al Queda... Guess that makes him an iraqnaphobe"

"""How fast can you hack into the system!?"" ""20-25 minutes."" ""You've got 10 minutes!"" ""Okay, well then I can't."" - real life spy dialogues"

"What's the difference between a stoner and a Jew? A stoner gets baked more than once"

"A man walks into a zoo... ..... and there's only one animal. It's a dog. A shih tzu."