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Joke of the Day

"I knew this guy who would ask men at church, ""is your tie made out of bird cloth?"" <blank stare> ""It's cheep, cheep, cheep."""

"What did Elton John call his tribute to Mother Teresa? Sandals in the Bin"

"I'd run way more miles a day if someone holding a bagel was running in front of me and someone holding a spider was chasing after me."

"A little bit of ash falls on Hitler's shoulder. He sweeps it off and says ""Fuck off Jew"""

"How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb? Third as many as for a regular bulb."

"A single gene that is dramatically different in chimpanzees and humans may explain why apes cannot talk. Oh well, at least they can still communicate through rap music."

"Just left a note on the ex's car saying ""I STILL LOVE YOU"" hope it doesn't go unnoticed. I keyed it in pretty deep."

"Urine is the opposite of you're out."

"How does an SJW screw in a light-bulb? Zir holds it up to the socket and waits for the world to revolve around zirself."

"What did the elephant say to the naked man? How do you drink out of that little thing?"