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Joke of the Day
"A third-party vote walks out of a bar... He says ""Wow, I'm wasted."""
Next Joke
 
"All the toilets have been stolen from Scotland Yard The police have nothing to go on"
"What did the ship say to the sexy ice-berg? I'd hit that."
"I should've been a child star so I could've gotten all my working out of the way and been an accomplished drug addict by now."
"""You've lost some weight."" sounds suspiciously like ""You were a disgusting fatso before, but I was too nice to say so.""."
"A thief broke into my house last night... he started searching for money so I woke up and searched with him"
"What has 99 legs and one tooth? The front row at a Willie Nelson concert."
"A woman walks into a bar She walks up to the counter and says to the bartender, ""Gimme a double entendre."" So he gives it to her."
"What do Mediterranean volcanoes make for dessert? bakLAVA"
"There is nothing funnier than yelling ""SHE'S STEALING MY BABY!"" at a mom having a hard time with her kid in public."