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Joke of the Day

"News just in. There are reports that all the toilets have been stolen at Scotland Yard. Police say they have nothing to go on."

"YO mama is so poor... She can't even pay attention"

"Who discovered Victoria Falls? Whoever tripped her."

"WAITER: Room for dessert? [flashback to the room at home that hides all my desserts] ME: [nervous laugh] Haha I don't have one of those."

"I looked at my girlfriend this morning... And said, ""Hey babe! Name me a [hypocorism](http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/hypocorism)."" To which she rolled her eyes and said, ""Honey..."""

"Relationship status: I tried to blow a kiss but it wants to just be friends"

"If I got a dime for every time I didn't know what was going on, I'd be asking people why they're giving me dimes."

"What do you call a transvestite postal worker? a mail lady"

"What do you call a cat that urinates in your shoes? Piss in boots Credit: My flatmate"

"Windows - the only operating system that is compatible with all viruses."