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Joke of the Day

"Do you know why I love working out? Because I always feel like a weight has been lifted."

"Stephen King has a son named Joe. I'm not joking, but he is!"

"What's the difference between a Feminist and a suicide jacket? Suicide jacket does something when it's triggered."

"""Say no to Lindsay Lohan."" - drugs."

"I assume every Chinese tattoo I see stands for ""This was a mistake."""

"What does a cloud with an itchy rash do? Find the nearest skyscraper."

"If I were a werewolf I wouldn't have to chain myself up at night because I don't like going out anyway."

"How were you conceived? Daddy came on his shoe and kicked mommy in the ass. Or Daddy came on the wall and mommy ran against the wall."

"Why don't they make Neapolitan ice cream but with 3 better flavors?"

"Jesus Christ excrement unearthed in Isreal.... ""Well, Holy Shit!"""