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Joke of the Day

"Whats the difference between a bird and a fly? A bird can fly but a fly can't bird!"

"A schizophrenic soldier took an enemy battalion prisoner. It was easy, he had them surrounded."

"If you're gonna kill yourself, at least do it on a parent's birthday so they know why."

"How is Sandusky like a tortoise? He gets there before the hair..."

"What did the pineapple say to the coconut? Pina Colada!"

"I went hardcore camping last weekend. Let's just say, it was intense."

"Why do comedians hate noble gasses? They give no reaction."

"What do you call a midget king? ""Your shortness."""

"A grand jury is made up of a cross-section of the community. I ride the train w/the cross-section & it's mostly people peeing on the floor."

"What's the difference between a gynecologist and a pedophile music teacher? The teacher fucks his singers, the gyno sucks his fingers."