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Joke of the Day

"I invented a new word! Plagiarism."

"My grandpa has a heart of a lion... ... and a lifetime ban from the zoo."

"How did LaKeisha's Mom finally stop her from bouncing on the trampoline in the rec room? She put a piece of velcro on the ceiling."

"I want to make a BDSM joke but I keep getting tied up on the punchline"

"I told my dad about the school shooting today I don't know why he got so worked up over picture day."

"Scientists believe the world began with the ""Big Bang"". Chuck Norris shrugs it off as a ""bad case of gas""."

"How many frames per second does it take to screw in a light bulb? 30 because that's peasants work."

"I was gonna tell a joke about boxing... ...then I forgot the punchline. I'll show myself out."

"I once accidentally broke up with a girl on a broken-down train, when I said ""I don't think this is going anywhere."""

"Turtles do nothing and are slow as hell, yet they live for like 200 years. I'll probably live forever."