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Joke of the Day
"The first thing I do when someone introduces themselves to me is forget what their name is."
Next Joke
"How do you know if a Chinese person robs your house? Your homework is done, your computer is upgraded, but two hours later, the fucker is still trying to back out of your driveway."
"Jerk chicken is just regular chicken that made fun of me in high school"
"People who don't understand sarcasm are awesome."
"When I see someone in public talking on a bluetooth..I like to position myself on the other side, lean in & whisper ""It's ok I see them too"""
"What's bad about being a black Jew? You have to sit in the back of the oven."
"They canceled school and reminded everyone to ""Prepare for a blackout"" I've got 2 bottles of Vodka and percocet Blackout is *so happening*"
"An alligator can grow up to 17 feet. But most only have four."
"My 5 yr old son was just imprisoned for skipping naptime He was resisting a rest"
"What if Daft Punk is just a couple of rad old ladies who met in knitting club and shared a love of sick beats?"