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Joke of the Day

"I think Google's a woman... Because it won't let you finish a sentence without coming up with other suggestions."

"It would just be mean to make a joke about the woman with lumber breast implants..... Wooden Tit"

"McDonald's sponsoring the Olympics is like Jack Daniels sponsoring the prom."

"Chess is actually quite easy... Knight takes Rook, King takes Queen, and Bishop molests the Pawns."

"*gets down on 1 knee* OMG *puts 2nd knee down* WHAT? *lays on floor* JIM? *snake noises* WHAT ARE YOU DOING? *slithers out of relationship*"

"Chuck Norris once roundhouse-kicked a ten dollar bill into 200 nickels."

"A skeleton walks into a bar and says ""Bartender, I'll have a beer please . . . and a mop"""

"Billy's father walked in to find him masturbating... ""Son stop doing that, or you'll go blind one day!"" ""I'm over here, dad!"""

"Did I tell you about my old girl friend with only one leg? Unfortunately we broke up. Turns out she leans both ways."

"Why can Chinese bands rehearse so much? They're never short of Sichuan musicians."