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Joke of the Day

"The world would be a better place if everybody drank alcohol. It would get even better if some of them choked on it."

"Alcohol and calculus don't go together very well. Don't drink and derive."

"I hate when movies use that fakey ""55555"" ZIP code so pranksters won't try mailing letters & postcards to the characters."

"When are they going to drug test the audience of ""The Price Is Right.""? No one should be that happy."

"Why does a man name his penis? Because he doesn't want a total stranger making 90% of his decisions."

"I went to Alcoholics Anonymous last week. The first thing they told me to do was to stop hanging around other alcoholics. So I stopped going."

"trying to be funny is hard I wake up in the morning with a good one and no one is around to hear it."

"I was going to tell a gay joke Butt fuck it! Not saying it's original but still funny"

"How do you prepare corn like Sean Connery? Shuck it long, and shuck it hard."

"New on NBC.... A buddy cop drama starring a mentally challenged detective and his Native American partner. They're gonna call it Tard and Feathered."