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Joke of the Day

"I just clogged a urinal?"

"This guy at the bar wouldn't shut up about how Zombies ""could be real"" So I killed him... If he comes back...He wins the argument"

"What did the pastor say when his blanket rose up from his bed? ""Holy Sheet!"""

"Why is six afraid lf seven? Because seven just came back from a trip to West Africa."

"I Finally Chose a College Major... Me: Dad, I think I want to go to college for botany. Dad: Are you sure? What made you interested in that? Me: Well it is a growing field."

"If you ever trip in public... ...get up, laugh a little, and say, ""Whoops, it's been awhile since I inhabited a body."""

"The ratio of guys to girls in my friend group Is undefined!"

"hi yes i'd like a vodka salad please ""you mean a bloody mary"" yeah yeah whatever just hurry it up"

"And the Lord said unto John ""come forth and receive eternal life."" But John came fifth and got a toaster."

"My girlfriend keeps complaining that nothing in this sub is funny She'll NEVER see this line because she doesn't open them."