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Joke of the Day
"Impress an Asian chick by treating her as an equal."
Next Joke
"I saw a middle aged man staring at a picture of his very first steps. With tears in his eyes, he told me he regrets ever replacing the steps with an elevator."
"Watching Mickey's Clubhouse with my 4yo and even he's asking why the hell would a duck like Donald need a life jacket."
"The ""bishop"" came to our church today He was a fucking impostor. Never once moved diagonally."
"I posed naked for a magazine today. Although from the reaction I got I think the newsstand owner would have preferred money."
"Civil War spoilers Lee surrenders at Appomatox Courthouse, Abe Lincoln is shot by John Wilkes Booth."
"Sex is like pizza. My wife won't let me have it until I lose weight."
"What is Jesus' favorite mathematical operation? The Cross Product"
"A neutron walks into a bar and asks: ""How much for a beer?"" The bartender replies: ""For you? No charge."""
"Why was the lightbulb invented? Somebody had an idea."