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Joke of the Day

"Dirty limericks? GO! [NSFW] There once was a girl named Alice Who used dynamite as a phallus They found her vagina in South Carolina And bits of her tits in Dallas"

"I should've been a sniper. They get to lie around all day and hardly lift a finger."

"How do two lesbians pass their time when on their period? Finger painting."

"You're stuck in 2nd person and you can't get out. Help you. Help you. Please. Help you You wrote this reddit post"

"Oxygen hydrogen sodium sodium Whats my name"

"A man walks into a psychiatrist's office wearing only Saran Wrap. The psychiatrist says, ""Well... I can clearly see your nuts""."

"What's the difference between 9/11 and Tianjin? I'm only 75% sure Jews did Tianjin"

"What do you call a yak that wants to talk to you about a network marketing opportunity? A cognac"

"A patient kept complaining about his life-support machine making a weird noise So I tried turning it off and back on again."

"I'm getting the band back together.... We're called New Direction."