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Joke of the Day

"I was at an ATM and this old lady asked me to help check her balance.. ..so I pushed her over."

"How do you make God laugh? Tell him your plans."

"Someone once said, there's safety in numbers.... Tell that to 6million Jews.. And a four man SS-squad."

"LOL What is Charlie Sheens middle name? Washingma Charlie Washingma Sheen"

"I see ur bio says 'Medical Intern'. Can you take a look at this *sends DM of mother-in-laws face* n tell me if it's infected. It is right?"

"A couple of Irishmen are walking down a dirt road . . . The come across a sign that says ""Tree Fellers Wanted"". One of them says to the other, ""To bad there's only two of us."""

"4yo: Can I have some more Easter candy? Me: After lunch 4yo: I want lunch right now. I'm starving!! Me: We just ate breakfast 4yo: Starving!"

"When Gregor Mendel did his groundbreaking experiments with pea plants, ... ...it was a classic case of publish or parish."

"What is stronger an elephant or a snail ? A snail because it carries it's house an elephant just carries its trunk !"

"What do you call a Mexican little person? A paragraph because he isn't a full ese (essay)..."