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Joke of the Day

"Did you know Steve Irwin would still be alive if he wore sunscreen? It protects from deadly rays."

"I told my friend, ""I like my women the way I like my computer. ... On my lap. Turned on and Virus free."" He said, ""I prefer mine under my desk and silent."""

"Why is the last chapter in a chemistry textbook about benzene? Because it's the PHENYL CHAPTER :D I came up with this myself. I'm so proud."

"What do you call a proton with big hair? A 'froton."

"What's the difference between a cup and a mug? being cupped is far more pleasurable than being mugged"

"How come north Carolina is the bluest state? Raleigh scattering"

"Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? He wanted to get a long little doggy"

"Days after a massive F5 tornado hits Mississippi.. ...financial experts estimate it did over 50 million dollars worth of good."

"Satan: you can spend eternity in hell OR you can go to work for the first time in 5 days. Me: hmmm Satan: well? Me: IM THINKING, DAMN IT"

"Unfortunately a skeleton couldn't go the prom He had nobody to go with."