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Joke of the Day

"What's a sorority girls favorite camera? A Like uh"

"Medical prices these days are ridiculous Why, something as simple as an amputation costs an arm and a leg."

"What's the difference between a hippie chick and a pizza? I don't peel the crust off of a pizza before I eat it"

"I locked my keys in my car outside an abortion clinic They get really angry if you go in and ask for a coat hanger"

"I love going climbing with my friends... They never fail to let me down."

"I tried running once. But I kept spilling my beer."

"[last supper] drunk jesus: *swinging baguette wildly* You want a piece of me!?"

"Why does Edward Woodwood have four D's in his name? Because otherwise his name would be E-war Woo-woo."

"How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his entire family"

"I hate that ""You know what to do"" voicemail greeting, because if a recently unfrozen caveman calls, I bet that makes him feel pretty bad."