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Joke of the Day

"Swallowing these multivitamins is like swallowing the Titanic Need a little water to wash it down."

"What is woman spelled backwards? Kitchen"

"50 cent is only a quarter of what he used to be."

"So I was at the bar last night.. and the waitress screamed...""Anyone know CPR?!"" I said, ""Hell, I know the entire alphabet!"" Everyone laughed...except this *one* guy."

"I got arrested for killing a black man. They charged me with impersonating a police officer."

"My daughter's been seeing someone called Jim. Only for an hour each time, always in sports gear and often sweaty afterwards. I don't approve"

"What did the amazed Kazakhstani say? That's Astana-shing"

"What's the difference between Kim Jong Un and Hillary Clinton? One is called ""The Great Leader"" and the other, ""Great Deleter"""

"Everyone has at least one friend who treats their Facebook status like their therapist."

"My dad and I talking. I asked my dad today ""What rhymes with orange?"" He replied ""No, it doesn't"""