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Joke of the Day
"Why was Yoda afraid of 7? Because 6, 7 8."
Next Joke
"""the pizza boy is here"" It's time, I thought, cocking my shotgun. I was sending this half pizza half man abomination straight back to hell"
"If I was in that Malaysian airplane my wife would find it in 10 minutes.."
"So far at work I've straightened a paper clip then tried bending it back to its original shape. Employee of the month right here."
"If I lived in medieval times I'd get laid a lot because ""Would dost thou enjoy my penis shoved into thine lady parts? sounds fucking classy."
"You know you're getting old when you go to a new doctor... ...and part of the new patient exam is carbon dating."
"I'll never rob a store because I don't want to see the police guess my weight on a wanted poster."
"One day I hope to watch a cable show that says ""Brought to you by.. The bill you pay every fucking month."""
"What is Samsung's next Note series phone after Note 7? Samsung Not Explode"
"I'll never forget where I was when I found out I have Alzheimer's"