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Joke of the Day

"My mom told me not to cry wolf, but it was too late.Wolves were pouring out of my tear ducts, filling the kitchen and adjoining living room."

Next Joke
 
"Grammar. The difference between feeling your nuts, and feeling you're nuts."
"A man went into a store to buy some condoms. ""That's 1 dollar 15 plus tax"" said the store assistant. ""I don't need tacks"" said the man. ""It'll stay up all by itself."""
"I got fucking hammered last night so I made sure I took the bus home It was ok, except for all the passengers screaming at me to stop driving."
"The world right now is like when you'd get bored with your Sim City and just use all the disaster options at once"
"Speaking of one-liners,"
"What did ataturk's Father Say to him when he did well? Adda-Turk"
"Ever read the book ""A Race To The Bathroom""? by Willie Makeit and Betty Wont."
"I sent an angel to watch over you last night but he came back saying he can't watch porn..."
"What do they do when the Queen has a baby? Fire a 21 gun salute. What do they do when a nun has a baby? Fire the dirty old Canon."