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Joke of the Day

"Jaws How do you know the girl from Jaws had dandruff? She left her Head & Shoulders on the beach"

"If you ask someone out and they say no, try it again in a few minutes wearing sunglasses and smoking a cigarette. #cool"

"What happens when you cross a mountain climber with a mosquito? Nothing, you can't cross a vector with a scaler."

"My father would always tell me, ""Son, someday you will go far..."" ""and I hope to God that you stay there."""

"He sat down and ordered a drink... The bartender said ""I'm sorry. We don't serve faster than light particles here."" A Nutrino walked into a bar."

"What's an algebra teachers favorite animal? A grr-affe http://metalinjection.junipconcepts.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/08/Giraffe-Tongue-Orchestra.jpg?1fed28"

"Did you hear what the ridiculous fraction ordered for lunch? I don't know either but I heard she tried to halve split-pea soup and pay with a quarter."

"How did the hipster burn her tongue? She ate her soup before it was cool"

"I bought a nice 12 year old scotch yesterday. His parents weren't pleased."

"How can you tell if a ghost is about to faint? He gets pale as a sheet."