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Joke of the Day

"So I walked into the pharmacy the other day... because I needed to grab some condoms. As I was checking out, the clerk asked, ""do you need a bag for that?"" I replied, ""Nah, she's not that ugly."""

"What do you call a black guy flying a plane? a pilot, you racist."

"Who decided that we should sit together in groups while we chew food?"

"I was listening to 80s music today. You just can't beat Tina Turner. Unless you're Ike Turner."

"My signature move at parties is flirting with a cute guy for half an hour before realizing he's actually a bag of Cheetos"

"What are Mario's overalls made out of DENIM DENIM DENIM"

"I care about how girls feel. The firmer the better."

"Lord of the Rings is symbolic of Marriage One ring rules your life, it slowly destroys you, and sometimes, death seems easier than continuing on."

"My rap name is ""NO PLANZ."""

"There's a strange new trend in my office... People have started naming food in the office fridge Today I ate a turkey sandwich called Kevin."