86471

Joke of the Day

"GUY FIERI: ""Just saying, I'm open all week if anybody requests me."" MAKE-A-WISH FOUNDATION OPERATOR: ""Stop fucking calling."""

"My uncle was a weird man...Artificial Legs.... Real feet"

"What should you do if you find yourself at a my chemical romance gig? Mope the fuck outta there."

"What is a buttress? A female goat."

"How many babies does it take to make light? 99, 98 get in a pile while 1 grabs a match and lighter fluid."

"For twenty years my wife and I were very happy people... ...then we met."

"Did you hear about the new tractor movie? I heard it has a good trailer."

"Girl on Facebook Heyy i have not seen u since high school. Me. It's been a while. Her. Yea been married 6 years now : ) Me. Unfriend"

"Man, I hated Alex Haley, the author of Roots... He always had his niggers in a *twist*."

"Professor X can move anything with his mind... except his legs."