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Joke of the Day

"What do you call the boss hit by a shrink ray? Micromanagement!"

"We should all give Earth a one star rating on TripAdvisor so hostile aliens won't want to come here."

"My king, the peasants are revolting! I know, they're disgusting."

"Q: How is a man like a snowstorm? A: You never know when he's coming how many inches you'll get or how long it will last."

"How to stop an unwanted DM. Hi, how are you? Me: Well, my ex has me on a wanted list because I'm a psychotic cow, how are you?"

"When people ask me for advice, I tell them, ""Use your best judgment,"" which they clearly don't have if they are asking me for advice."

"Fat girl on a table I went to bar , and there was a fat girl dancing on the tables "" nice legs"" I said "" you think so?"" She replied "" Sure,most tables would have collapsed by now!"""

"I used to date a girl with a lazy eye. I had to break up with her. She was seeing somebody on the side."

"What do you call a nerd girl with big boobs? ...iRacky."

"What happened to the trapeze artist that did drugs on the job? He got suspended."