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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a zoo that only has dogs? A shit zoo."

"Why did Kermit break up with Miss Piggy? He wasn't ready for a Kermitment."

"I'm taking a stand. If the stand owners come looking for it, you guys saw nothing."

"TIL Condoms have serial numbers.. ..but I've never rolled one down far enough to find out.."

"I just passed by Canadian citizenship test! I got an eh +"

"How did the turtle call his friends? ...on his shellphone"

"Sharks prefer Stevie Wonder to Ray Charles in a blind taste test."

"If the fortune has turned her back on you, you can do whatever you want behind her back."

"How do you catch a unique bird? Unique up on it."

"- How much for the mobile tampon? - Ma'am? - It's a bit big. - Ma'am, it's a lamb. - Does it make that sound because it has detected blood?"