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Joke of the Day

"The moment when you realise that you've just lost 10 seconds of your life. [Your life]^1^0^s^e^c^o^n^d^s"

"If you want some alone time, tell your husband that you're going to watch the Bachelor. Even if you're not."

"I just got a girl pregnant, now ill finally have a little brother."

"What do you call a confused gnu? A bewildebeest."

"What kind of shoes do therapists wear? Issues."

"is it rude to throw a breath mint in some ones mouth while they are talking?"

"""What's up, doc?"" says Bugs Bunny. ""Not you,"" laughs the doctor. ""Take these little blue pills."" *Looney Tunes music plays*"

"Farmers are always so proud of themselves until you ask if they can put the milk back in the cow"

"Why do Americans hate sunlight? Because it's yellow and settles on their land too. And it melts snow."

"The only reason the term 'Ladies first' was invented was for the guy to check out the woman's ass."