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Joke of the Day

"The only reason the term 'Ladies first' was invented was for the guy to check out the woman's ass."

"Did you hear about the guy whose left arm and left leg got chopped off? He died."

"If you're upset about seeing a middle finger on TV, you're going to sh!t yourself when you see everything else going on in the world."

"A Day in Court"

"My first time having sex was like my first time riding a bike .. my dad was holding me from behind .."

"What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend? He flushed."

"As my wife and three of her friends squeezed into the car after WeightWatchers.... I muttered under my breath, ""Fat fucking cows."" ""What was that?"" snapped my wife. ""You herd."""

"There's a 100% chance the Republicans will discuss Starbucks cups in a debate tonight, so remember that when they ask how they lost in 2016."

"Why can't the bicycle stand on its own ? Because its two tyred"

"Why do Scottish men wear kilts instead of jeans? Because a sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away."