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Joke of the Day

"I like when a girl wears a pearl necklace But only for the first 10 seconds or so. You know, before it's hard and crusty"

Next Joke
 
"If Wednesday is hump day... ...is Tuesday foreplay day?"
"Son: ""Dad! My lsd is missing!"" Dad: ""We have bigger problems son, there's a dragon in the kitchen."""
"Why would Hilary Clinton as president be good for the economy? We would only need to pay her 78 cents on the dollar."
"What did Spock find in the Enterprises's toilet? ... ... ... ... ... ... The captain's log!"
"Why did the feminist masseuse stop at the thigh? She didn't like to massage a knee."
"I went to the doctor and he gave me 2 months to live... I went to the doctor and he gave me 2 months to live. I shot him and the judge gave me 30 years."
"MAN: See my tattoo? It says ""Only God can judge me."" GOD: That shirt with those pants?"
"North Korea claiming they test fired a big rock at Russia."
"What did the raisin see when she came home early from work? Her husband on a date."