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Joke of the Day

"Congratulations /r/Jokes! You are subreddit of the day! Come check it out!"

"I started seeing a psychic. I knew she was good because she told me she's voted best in the city 2017 and 2018."

"I hate him I hate him I hate him I hate him I hate him I hate him I hate him I hate him I hate him I hate him GOD, I hope he calls me."

"*throws back out* Back: Let me back in baby, I can change."

"It's been so long, I think my virginity is growing back."

"I'm not saying my ex is crazy,but The only way to take her picture, is with a Bi-Polaroid"

"What do you call someone with no arms and no legs being towed behind your boat? Skip."

"Pete Carrol has kidney stone complications. It should have been removed by surgery.... (wait for it).... But he decided to try to pass it."

"I'm the flower, you're the bee. Why don't you suck the sweet pollen right out of me?"

"How to catch a polar bear. Dig a hole in the ice and line it with peas. Then when he goes to take a pea just kick him in the ice hole."