84295

Joke of the Day

"oh sally Why did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? NOT SALLY!"

"Where do you find an old Onion article? In thier archives."

"How do you make a dwarf taller? Ge-gnome therapy"

"what do you call a retarded person who crapped their pants down in the dump."

"Are you guys all right? No, you're all left. (Stolen from a master comedian from x factor)"

"What is a seal's favorite drink? Club soda"

"If you don't like my opinion of you improve yourself!"

"My girlfriend broke up with me because I am extremely handsome and too many girls want me She said something else about my chronic lying disorder but I wasn't really listening"

"A Limerick There once was a barmaid in Salles, On her chest wrote the price of ale. And on her behind, For the sake of the blind, Was the same information in Braille."

"Why do procrastinators live the longest? Because they die at the last second."