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Joke of the Day
"Whoever stole my dildo can go fuck themselves."
Next Joke
"How many psychologists does it take to change a lightbulb? One, but the lightbulb has to WANT to change."
"Take something someone says, then perceive it in every terrible way imaginable POOF you're a woman."
"No one likes my puns about borrowing money, but I'm okay being a-loan. *drinks tears from tear jar*"
"[walks up to firefighters trying to put out a fire] it's alright guys i got this one. *whips out a flamethrower* TIME TO FIGHT FIRE WITH FI-"
"[2018] ALIEN: take me to ur leader ME: uh ok *takes him to president Donald Trump* ALIEN: lol good one but seriously where's ur real leader"
"What is a dentist's favorite dinosaur? A Flossiraptor! I'll just show myself out..."
"I just invented a new catch phrase What's yer Rush Limbaugh? Get back to me immediately and tell me if you love it or just like it."
"*shakes self after staring at ceiling* Sorry honey, I was just thinking about Mitt Romney"
"You can't run through a camp ground. You can only ran, because it's past tents."