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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about that new film on the B-17 aircraft? It bombed"

"Why do Redditors get excited when a tornado rips down miles of fences? Because there is a lot of reposting to do."

"What's the difference between garbanzo beans an chickpeas? I don't have to play $50 for a garbanzo bean in my face."

"What do you call a Communist Sniper? A Marxman."

"I wanna see Le Pan Quotidien fight Au Bon Pain in a pretentious chain restaurant cage match & the winner gets to fight Pret-a-Manger."

"A very drunk man walks into a bar He yells: two large beers and a packet of crisps please! Lady: sir, this is a library. Man, whispering: two large beers and a packet of crisps please!"

"Jesus Christ fed 2,000 people with 5 loaves of bread and 2 fish... ... but Adolf Hitler made 6 million Jews toast."

"Why does Dr. Pepper come in bottles? Because his wife died. Also; what is Forest Gump's password? 1Forest1"

"Remember when dresses were slightly longer but still cute, and when I bent over my gender didn't show? I want those back."

"Two in one **Dude**: My IQ is absolutely massive! **Guy**: IQ is a representation of your matriarchal heritage? **Dude**: Clever.. maybe my IQ that big after all **Guy**: Ah, *patriarchal* heritage!"