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Joke of the Day

"Sexting gone wrong I accidentally sent a picture of my dick to everyone in my address book today. Not only was it really embarrassing, it cost me a fortune in stamps."

"When I die, I might have an open casket funeral. Remains to be seen."

"Why did the man invest in the kilovolt battery? He thought it had a lot of potential."

"What do you call a magic dog? Labracadabrador."

"Look girl, all I'm saying is , if I have to choose between you and chocolate milk Be prepared to cry"

"Dad joke #31939: A guy walks into a bar. Ouch."

"Haven't seen the new Star Wars yet... But everybody posting spoilers about how Princess Leia dies Edit: Highest rated post! RIP inbox"

"The Oedipal complex.. It's the difference between MILF and M,ILF."

"I started eating healthier recently. Instead of chicken wings alone I now drink beer with them, thus, preventing coking and prolonging life."

"A girl once broke up with me... A girl once broke up with me because I quoted Linkin Park too much. It was a great releationship, but in the end it doesn't even matter."