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Joke of the Day
"Wife just got me a new tv for Christmas! Looks like my New Years resolution is 1080."
Next Joke
"Tweets are like your children: you love them all at first, you never know how they'll age, and most of them you regret creating."
"Q: How do you tell a brown bear from a grizzly bear? A: Climb a tree. If the bear climbs up and eats you, it's a brown bear. If the bear knocks the tree down and eats you, it's a grizzly."
"What is the difference between a Caucasian and an Asian? A Cauc."
"A roman guy enters a bar, raises two fingers... And say to the bartender: five beers, please!"
"What would Donald Trump say if he was Mexican? 'WE NEED TO BUILD A RAMP!'"
"A girl called me yesterday and said ""Come over there's no one home."" I went over. Nobody was home."
"4 said he went potty and I asked if it was number one or number two. He said number 7, and now I'm terrified to go into the bathroom."
"According to old paintings, there's mad titties in heaven."
"Knock knock Who's there? An owl An owl who? That's my line!"