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Joke of the Day

"My old Mum used to say, ""Always give your food a good rinse before you eat it."" Lovely woman, terrible sandwiches."

Next Joke
 
"What do you call a girl with anorexia and a yeast infection? a quarter pounder with cheese."
"So I went to the proctologist.... [insert joke here]"
"I came here to kick ass and chew gum... And I've got new, longer-lasting Stride, so we'll be here for a while."
"Anyone know if Hallmark makes a ""Sorry about your miscarriage, but it was my first time playing Bocce Ball"" card?"
"I keep forgetting which Disney princess is it who solves all her own problems without trying to find a boyfriend?"
"What is Cthulu's favorite pizza? deep dish"
"Had trouble sleeping today. They added a trumpeter to this morning's church service."
"Two nuns went on a bike ride... ...and one says to the other, as they turn down a side street ""I've never come this way before!"" And the other replies ""yes! It's the cobblestones!"""
"My wife left me *sobs uncontrollably*"