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Joke of the Day

"I came here to kick ass and chew gum... And I've got new, longer-lasting Stride, so we'll be here for a while."

"No matter how kind you are ... German children will always be Kinder"

"Have you guys ever seen any of my exes? Exactly."

"Have you heard the ""good news"" about Jesus? It's his daughter's quinceanera today so he can't do our lawn"

"Reddit, what is the most disgusting joke you know of? I'll start What does eating yoghurt and a girl on her period have in common? You never know when the lumps appear..."

"Don't judge men by their wealth or appearance, judge them by their characters. All 140 of them."

"Republican luminary Sarah Palin. If I have to explain then its not funny. If I have to explain then you most likely voted for the Republican luminary Sarah Palin."

"Why didnt the witch have any children? Because her husband had a hollow weenie"

"*beats dead horse* *kills two birds with 1 stone* *lets cat out of bag* *takes bull by horns* *breaks camels back* *gets kicked out of zoo*"

"Had a near death experience last night A cop pulled me over."