82899

Joke of the Day

"Why do women always sleep on the left side of the bed? BECAUSE THEY HAVE NO RIGHTS!!!!!"

"The helicopter was invented after Chuck Norris was observed doing 8 roundhouse kicks a second."

"Why do sailors use liquid soap? It takes longer to pick up when they drop it."

"Taylor Swift seems like one of those chicks who thinks it's cute to put her bare feet on the dashboard of a car when riding shotgun."

"H: Well, the remote was definitely broken, so I went and bought a new one. Me: H: Oh, and it came with this 75"" television."

"Hey, people who don't properly re-seal your half empty bags of potato chips... what's it like eating spider eggs?"

"You don't need to write ""imo"". Nobody is confusing your tweets with Nietzsche."

"Are people in culinary school required to do dessertations?"

"The Counselor was talking to the campers about safety. She said 'Don't climb any trees. If you fall down and break a leg don't come running to me!'"

"What do you call a bee's rear end? A Bee-Hind"