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Joke of the Day

"I wonder if the Cabbage Patch Kids grew up to be bastards & whores that left their offspring in random gardens like their parents did."

"What's black and sits on top of a staircase? Stephen Hawking in a house fire."

"Ready, Set, Go... Did you hear about the muslim who was shot by a starting pistol? It was race related."

"What does a laser in a church sound like? Pew pew pew!"

"I like my women like I like my coffee. Easy to have sex with."

"Hair growing from my ears and nostrils doesn't mean I'm getting old, right? Means I'm turning into a werewolf! Right?"

"A rubberball company went broke... But they bounced back"

"WOULD YOU RATHER: have six arms or giant antlers? (You don't really get a choice; the surgeons were just sort of curious.)"

"What is 4 inches long, 2 inches wide and drives women crazy when they see it? An empty toilet paper roll."

"Ian: ""I baked you a pie to say sorry for backing over your cat in my car."" Tim: ""You did what?!"" Ian: ""Baked you a pie."""