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Joke of the Day
"How does an astronaut cut his hair? Eclipse it."
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"A Polish guy goes for eye test. Doctor points towards the last line on Eye Test Chart, S I S Z T R Z T O W S K I Doctor, ""Can you read that?"" Polish guy, "" Read that? I fucking know that guy!!!"""
"What do you call a potato with no limbs? An amputater"
"what is the stupidest animal in the jungle? the polar bear"
"You know how you play Iranian bingo? A-10, B-52, F-22, C-130"
"GOD: welcome to Heaven I will answer any question you want now. ME: why does Target have 25 checkout lanes with only 2 always open? GOD: ..."
"How many men does it take to open a beer? None. It should be opened by the time she brings it to the couch."
"On one hand, I want to stop masturbating but on the other hand, I have my penis..."
"The hardest part of being Darth Vader is never being able to sneak up on anyone because your theme music started playing."
"I have a job for you planting tulips.... ON DIS DICK!"