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Joke of the Day

"A priest, a rapist, and a pedophile walk in to a bar. And he orders a drink."

"I can't stop reading things as if there were a punchline.. See what I mean?"

"A buddy had a lawn mower accident and died after getting the ends of his feet cut off. Doctors diagnosed him as lack-toes intolerant"

"Did youz guys hear about the blow job competition last night? It was nuts, the race was neck and neck till the very end!"

"How is being at a singles bar different from going to the circus? At the circus, the clowns don't talk."

"What's black, white, red, and has trouble going through a revolving door? A nun with a spear through her head."

"I'd tell my neighbor about the weird smell coming from her apartment, but she's been so quiet that I don't want to disturb her."

"If my name was Dave I'd text my friends today saying ""IT'S FRIDAVE! LET'S PARTY!"". They'd be sick of me by Tuesdave."

"What's the only thing better than Roses on a Piano? Answer: Tulips on an Organ."

"A hat and a tie are out running The tie gets tired and says he needs a break. The hat replies ""Don't worry. You hang around and I'll go on ahead."""