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Joke of the Day

"A hat and a tie are out running The tie gets tired and says he needs a break. The hat replies ""Don't worry. You hang around and I'll go on ahead."""

"Emma Stone is my girlfriend. Nobody tell her, though. I want it to be a surprise."

"2 blondes walk into a building You would think one of them would have seen it"

"What's long, hard, and has cum in it? A cucumber. edit: words"

"So I took a practice test on photons today... It didn't matter."

"I was going to buy a book on phobias But I was afraid it wasn't going to work"

"How do you tell if a girl in Nebraska is a virgin? She can outrun her brothers... *mic drop* ""I'm out..."""

"What's Bill Clintons favorite holiday? According to Lewinsky... Happy Employee Appreciation Day!"

"People can be so easy to read.... ....Like if their face is red, they're embarrassed. Or if their skin is brown, they're about to commit a crime."

"""Space heater"" is a pretty ambitious name. How about ""shin warmer?"""