81678

Joke of the Day

"Shout out to countless marine organisms who died, accreted on the seafloor, and compacted for eons so I could drive my Escalade to Kmart."

"Half-Life 3 is getting made."

"Ever heard of the blind hooker? You really gotta hand it to 'er."

"Why does Pope Francis call his dick Santa? Because he comes to the good kids only."

"How can you tell if your dog is gay? If he's sucking another dogs dick in the back of a gay dog night club."

"What was Hitler's favorite way to tie his boots? In Nazi's!"

"I keep trying to make funny eye puns... But my friends say they keep getting cornea and cornea."

"Does advertisement work? Just did."

"My black girlfriend told me this on our first date. What do you call 200 black people in a barn? Antique farm equipment."

"I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people."