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Joke of the Day

"The weather data was unclear."

"Roses are red Oh, by the way, I have Alzheimers Happy Veterans Day"

"I went to the Air and Space Museum It wasn't as empty as I thought it'd be."

"An unfortunate blind date. that's the last blind date I go on. She turned up. hit me with her cane then her dog bit me. It was like she couldn't even see."

"What do you do when a bird attacks you? Duck."

"Apple products of late is a crime against good design The iPhone battery case should be charged as an accessory"

"My girlfriend hired a midget to play the keyboards at my birthday party I think she misunderstood me. I did not say I wished I had a 12 inch pianist."

"Why was the cat so small ? Because it only ate condensed milk !"

"When a woman asks how good I am in bed... I'm definitely not the second coming."

"My mate just rang me in tears... His wife has left him, taken his prized Bob marley collection and the Satellite dish. Poor Bastard.. No woman, no sky..."