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Joke of the Day

"Not only is my short-term memory horrible... So is my short-term memory."

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"Why do Egyptian farts smell the same? They have toots in common."
"I watched Canadian porn today... 2 girls 1 Stanley Cup ----------------- Credit Jeff Ross"
"Why did Germany run out of gas? Because they gave it to the Jews I'll be in Argentina for awhile."
"My friend hates theme parks because he doesn't like the idea of waiting for 5 hours for 2 minutes of pleasure. And yet he still goes on dates."
"What's the difference between unlawful and illegal? One is against the law and the other is a sick bird."
"A horse walks into a bar .. .. as Miranda and Samantha were already waiting, Charlotte was running late."
"How does a vampire clean his house? With a victim cleaner."
"I'm suffering from bad breath You should do something about it! I did. I just sent my wife to the dentist."
"How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It's a really obscure number, you've probably never heard of it"