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Joke of the Day
"What does a Super Star Destroyer wear to a formal occasion? A bow T.I.E."
Next Joke
"In retrospect, when the cop pulled me over & asked ""where's the fire"", stroking a lighter & whispering ""haven't decided yet"" was a mistake."
"What's the difference between a sumo and a feminist? A sumo shaves their legs."
"What's the worst part about having Comcast internet? Loading..."
"Why can't you hear a pterodactyl use the restroom? The P is silent."
"Why are Ford cars so popular? Because they are affordable."
"Knock Knock Who's there ! Alex ! Alex who ? Alex Plain later !"
"Tony Romo, Michael Vick, and Eli Manning walk into a bar... ...to watch the playoffs."
"Man, Asians drive so bad . . . I'm starting to think Pearl Harbor was an accident."
"Me: *crawls in window* Him: What are you doing?! Me: You're my boyfriend now? Him: I'm calling the cops Me: But you retweeted me??"