80729

Joke of the Day

"pplease remember to turn your location on so the buffoons on this web site can have an easier time finding you, for whatever horrible reason"

"Who has to always be on there toes? A midget at a urinal."

"In 1466, Dracula started eating 16-year-old virgins. In 2015, he died of starvation."

"I'm not a racist. Racism is a crime and crime is for black people."

"Rick Astley will lend you any of the Pixar films in his collection, except one. He's never gonna give you Up."

"BEST PICK UP LINE: I wasn't looking at your boobs, I was staring into your heart...no, I lied , your boobs are awesome."

"The average person has sex 89 times a year It's gunna be one hell of a week for me."

"People who say they don't have any problems are lying to you, but at least give them credit for not telling you about them."

"What's got two legs and bleeds? Half a dog"

"Q: What dinosaur can't stay out in the rain? A: Stegosaur-rust!"