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Joke of the Day

"I burned my Hawaiian pizza today... I shoulda cooked it at aloha temperature."

"Did you hear that the guy who in invented bingo had a recent health scare? The tumor ended up being B9."

"Noses and Boyfriends Boyfriends are like noses... People get disgusted when you blow them in public. Especially if you're caught without a tissue"

"If an Apple today keeps the doctor away... If an Apple today keeps the doctor away then he must be using IOS6 maps."

"[NSFW] What goes between boobs, and gets longer the more you pull on it? A seatbelt"

"[interview] ""Tell me about a time you defied authority to achieve a goal."" Me: no"

"Mermaids who never get married eventually accumulate a bunch of catfish."

"I think I've finally crossed the line. ~~Line.~~"

"When does a fuckboy become a fuckman? At his bar mitzfuck."

"A Scotsman and an Irish man walk into a bar And the Scotsman shouts ""All the drinks are on me!"" The next morning the headlines read *""Irish Ventriloquist Found Dead Behind Bar""*"