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Joke of the Day

"Last night I was driving down an old country road when I hit a pedestrian going 50 mph. It seemed to take forever for help to arrive. That's the last time I use that towing company."

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"What happened to the man with two wooden legs whose house burnt down? He fell on his ash."
"Damn girl, are you Reddit? Cus you repeat the same stupid shit over and ov-- Aww shit........."
"Every time I have sex with a woman I always assume she has herpes... ...that way I don't have to tell her about mine."
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"Today I played chess with some old men in the park. It was hard to round up 32 of them."