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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between jelly and jam? You can't jelly a dick up your ass!"

"Best worst pick up lines? Anything and everything. ""Hey, how much does a seal weigh?"" "" I dunno?"" ""Just enough to break the ice."""

"What do you call a fruit that procrastinates? ...A Cramberry!"

"Where does a beaver priest live? In a God Dam House!"

"They tried to make me go to rehab, and I said ""My HMO doesn't cover residential treatment."""

"Pirate joke what I made up What do you call a pirate with two legs, two arms and two eyes? Noob."

"I became a vegetarian 4 months ago.. .. I guess you can say that I quit cold turkey"

"Did you know when a man masturbates he generates 5 BTU of energy.. So if you had 5000 men in a room masturbating, it would be extremely gay."

"Margaret Sanger."

"Make sure your blind date from the internet has a big car. Nothing worse than a trunk with no leg room."