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Joke of the Day

"With this whole Anonymous attack, ISIS is finally getting what they wanted... ...fucked by 72 virgins."

"I'm no super genius, but I bet the most effective way to lose ""baby weight"" is to have the baby."

"Aren't some of the methods used to kill people on death row... ...absolutely shocking"

"How do you start a rave in Ethiopia? Staple a piece of bread to the ceiling"

"What was Hitler's problem when the lights went out? He could Nazi. Edit: Fuck me, Reddit. I heard you *liked* puns..."

"*Frantically typing on google* 'How to do CPR' *Opens video, 30 second ad pops up* [To dying person] Ok just hold on a sec"

"As the judge said to the dentist: Do you swear to pull the tooth the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?"

"Why does Star Wars Movies numbering scheme starts with 4,5,6? Because in charge of the numbers, Yoda was"

"TIL a man went in to have his right leg amputated but somehow they removed his left. After the mistake was corrected, he then sued but lost Judge said he didn't have a leg to stand on"

"Wow! This whole being up early is neat; it's like daytime but sooner! Huh! The birds... they sound, you know, pretty! It's all a bit scary."